October 23, 2009
Despite other suitors, including a young fan (video footage), tennis star Steffi Graf married Andre Agassi on October 22, 2001. Agassi still had hair and Graf still had all of all of her glorious nose.
While their appearances have changed and their tennis skills declined, the two have thrown their energies into the Andre Agassi Foundation for Education.
But that’s not say that Agassi is a total angel. Agassi once struck his wife with a vicious backhand during this fund raiser in Houston (YouTube footage).
October 21, 2009
On ESPN’s First Take, bald Steeler receiver Hines Ward said he would love to have Troy Polamalu’s hair for one day, but only for one day because it takes Polamalu 45 minutes to shampoo his hair.
Through the magic of Photoshop, Polamalu’s long hair was placed on all of the analysts, including grumpy Skip Bayless. The hair didn’t suit Bayless as much as the toupee he currently wears.
For more reasons why Skip Bayless sucks–read this Deadspin article.
October 21, 2009
Nobody rocks the Likud Party quite like Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu. And nobody combs it over quite like today’s birthday boy.
Born in Tel Aviv on October 21, 1949, Netanyahu is a Libra who keeps busy planning for an attack on Iran’s nuclear weapons program, but still finds time to update his Facebook page. Everybody needs friends.
October 21, 2009
Former heavyweight champion Evander “The Real Deal” Holyfield was born on October 19, 1962.
After losing his hair and the heavyweight title, Holyfield probably figured he couldn’t lose much more. Then Mike Tyson ate away part of his ear, years of punches killed numerous gray cells, and then creditors took his money. Now he’s dong Burger King commercials, begging for more fights and even hawking his own Real Deal Grill that looks suspiciously similar to George Foreman’s much more successful grill.
September 18, 2009
Rapidly balding Hank Baskett has signed with the Indianapolis Colts after being dumped by the Philadelphia Eagles (related article).
The 3rd rate wide receiver is better known for his wife, Playboy centerfold and reality “star,” Kendra Wilkinson. A big distraction for any NFL team, it says something that the Eagles cut Hank to make room for convicted dog fighter Michael Vick.
September 3, 2009
According to a recent Wall Street Journal article, Professional football player Matt Hasselbeck, is the 4th most attractive quarterback in the National Football League. The bald Seattle Seahawk beat out Tom Brady, Mark Sanchez and Tony Romo. Because he’s way hotter.
What is it that gives Matt “heartthrob” Hasselbeck the advantage? Facial symatry, apparently. That may not be the chief criteria of pop singers and Brazilian super models, but it’s of primary concern for researchers at Ursinus College. It may sound far fetched, but on behalf of bald men everywhere, I say “We’ll take it.”
September 2, 2009
Disgraced congressman Jim Traficant walked out of federal prison today after serving a seven year term for bribery, fraud and racketeering (related story).
Media outlets failed to describe whether he wore the same ridiculous (but trademark) toupee that he wore when sentenced. They did mention he donned a gray T-shirt, white shorts and white socks, a far cry from the bell bottoms and denim suits he wore while in congress.
While a polarizing political figure, he broke up the monotany of CSPAN with his eccentric dress, wild toupee, and his catchphrase ending to floor speeches: “Beam me up.”
Despite his criminal record, Traficant remains popular in his Youngstown, Ohio district. He even received 15% of the vote in one election while he was incarcerated.
So have we seen the last of Jim Traficant’s political life, or, as many suspect, will he return to electoral politics? Only time will tell.
August 19, 2009
Political commentator and journalist, Robert Novak, died Tuesday at the age of 78. The “Prince of Darkness” had been battling brain cancer since 2008. Like, Novac, his impressive combover is probably in a better place now.
Best known for his Chicago Tribune column and for co-hosting crossfire, Novac loved the journalism profession. However, in recent years his journalistic reputation was tainted by his involvement in the Valerie Plame leak case.
Generations of political junkies swore by or swore at his opinions. And anyone who watched him on crossfire was drawn to the certainty of his convictions as well as the absurdity of his hair.
August 10, 2009
Dan Aykroyd recently announced filming of Ghostbusters III will commence soon and that he and fellow baldy Bill Murray will play their accustomed roles in it (related article).
It’s been a lot of years since Ghostbusters II. The cast has gone their separate ways. Murray was nominated for an Oscar, lost more hair and had his wife walk out on him. Aykroyd puttered around Hollywood, developed his own brand of vodka and purchased some hair plugs.
But now they’re back and the Internet is abuzz with questions about the script and whether Rick Moranis will still co-star.
