December 17, 2009
In a press release, Rogaine introduced Utah Jazz forward Karl Malone as its’ pitchman (12/15/1998). Karl “The Mailman” Malone claimed he’d seen results in just two months. It wasn’t long before Malone saw those results wind up on the floor of his shower.
Henri Becquerel, a Nobel Prize-winning French physicist who co-discovered radiation… long after he discovered baldness (born: 12/15/1852).
Zamenhof Day, held in honor of Polish physician L.L. Zamenhof, inventor of Esperanto, the most popular “planned language” in the world–and on his birthday no less (12/15/1859).
The St. Louis Business Journal reported four of Bing Crosby’s toupees had been found in boxes of material donated to Gonzaga University in Spokane, Washington, his alma mater, (12/15/2000). The toupees, which Crosby called “scalp dollies,” were found in an aptly named box marked “Crosby toupees.”
Gawker.com reported discovering a secret memo written by Donald Trump’s face to his toupee, in which the the rug is accused of taking up too much prime real estate on the forehead, (12/15/2003).
Donald Trump inspires so many people: Miss America contestants, hopeful billionaires, future interns for billionaires, and country singer Kasey Jones, who wrote the song “I Hate Donald Trump’s Hair.” You can download it here.
Filed under Art, Birthday, Celebrity Toupee, Hollywood, Nobel Prize, Sceince, Sports, baldness, music
Tags: Bing Crosby, December 15, Esperanto, Henry Becquerel, Karl Malone, Kasey Jones, LL Zamenhof
December 11, 2009
With few men left who she hasn’t dated, Jessica Simpson has recently hooked up with former Smashing Pumpkins frontman Billy Corgan. One is a bald malcontent and the other is a ditz. What do they see in each other? According to Simpson’s twitter account: “My friend, Billy Corgan, has a pure and enlightening outlook on faith.
December 11, 2009
Happy birthday Sinead O’Connor (12/8/1966) and Sam Kinison (12/8/1953). The Sagitarius would have made a lovely, but unlikely, couple.
December 11, 2009
On December 6, 1997, Gene Keady, became the all-time-winningest coach in Purdue’s men’s basketball history. Truly a fine accomplishment, and maybe people would have taken note if they hadn’t been preoccupied with another Keaty-related December 6th event: National Bad Hair Day.
Gene Keady possesses one of the most sickening combovers in the history of hairloss. Their are various theories as to what his technique he uses: Shoe polish? Motor oil? Or more likely he uses what’s called the “wet comb.” By wetting a sponge or washcloth he’s able to press his hair down in what appears to be an oil slick. It’s a death sentence for any shorebirds who get caught in it.
Happy birthday to comedian Steven Wright (12/6/1955), a funny man who once asked an audience “What hair color do they put on the drivers licenses of bald men?” He also wrote a book about a man living in a parallel universe who is arrested for inventing hockey.
December 9, 2009
Birthday boy, and Spanish dictator, Francisco Franco was born 12/4/1892. He would later grow up, join the military, and turn into a big douche bag. It wasn’t long until he was oppressing the people and posing for portraits while wearing animal pelts. And not just regular pelts, but those of animals whose limbs had been amputated. Just little furry stubs. No paws. Disgusting really.
Even though human life is “nasty, brutish and short,” English philosopher and political theorist, Thomas Hobbes, stuck it out for 91 years. He died 12/4/1679.
Famed psychologist Albert Bandura was born 12/4/1925, but cares really.
December 9, 2009
Benny Hinn: a televangelist with the most structurally unsound combover in the history of mankind, was born12/3/1952.
President John Quincy Adams, the baldest president in American history, loses his re-election bid to Andrew Jackson, 12/3/1828.
Influential French director Jean-Luc Godard, once married to the beautiful Anna Karina, was born 12/3/1930.
Swiss mountain climbing guide Ulrich Inderbinen, who climbed the Matterhorn 370 times, was born 12/3/1900
Bald Laker’s forward Karl Malone elbows mop-headed Dallas Mavericks point guard Steve Nash in the face, nearly knocking out a tooth and forcing the Canadian to get two stitches (video), 12/3/2003.
December 9, 2009
December 2nd is National Safety Razor Day. And as if that isn’t enough reason for bald people to celebrate, there’s also these other significant days in bald history for December 2nd.
Edmond Rostand, a French dramatist, poet, and dandy, died on December 2, 1918.
Rapper Treach, the front man for Naughty by Nature, was born December 2nd 1970.
Fashion designer Gianni Versace, was born December 2. 1946
December 9, 2009
Black people have Def Comedy Jam. White people have Blue Collar Comedy. And isn’t all the laughter just distracting us from the racial divide that continues to polarize this nation.
Who will cure us? Barack Obama you ask? No. He’s busy with Afghanistan, health care and the economy. This looks like a job for Todd Bridges.
But don’t think that Todd Bridges comes alone. Todd Bridges has wrangled up quite a crew of his funniest fellas to back him up. Allow Todd Bridges to present his Bad Bald Boys of Comedy.
Made up of Derrick Cameron and Morgan Preston, the Bad Bald Boys represent the most narrow definition of diversity. One is white. One is black. And for all I know they both might be funny. So in the name of Todd Bridges, come together as a people… at a comedy club near you. This is what Willis is talking about.
November 22, 2009
On November 19, 1998, Kenneth Starr, accompanied by his combover, appears before the House Judiciary Committee to present evidence against President Bill Clinton, a man with much thicker hair.
San Francisco Giants’ right fielder Barry Bonds (pictured here doing his best Serena Williams impression) won his record 4th consecutive MVP award (7th overall) on November 19, 2004. Cheaters do win.
James Garfield, 20th president of the United States, was born on November 19, 1831. Not really the most popular guy to hold office, but definitely a bald one.
Filed under Bald Athletes, Bald Politicians, Combover, Politics, Sports
Tags: bald, Barry Bonds, James Garfield, Kenneth Starr, November 19, Steroids, US President
November 22, 2009
During a recent episode of The Colbert Report, Stephen Colbert shaved Woody Harrelson’s head. In honor of the troops, both sang the Star Spangled Banner while Colbert worked the clippers.
In a press release, Rogaine introduced Utah Jazz forward Karl Malone as its’ pitchman (12/15/1998). Karl “The Mailman” Malone claimed he’d seen results in just two months. It wasn’t long before Malone saw those results wind up on the floor of his shower.
Henri Becquerel, a Nobel Prize-winning French physicist who co-discovered radiation… long after he discovered baldness (born: 12/15/1852).
Zamenhof Day, held in honor of Polish physician L.L. Zamenhof, inventor of Esperanto, the most popular “planned language” in the world–and on his birthday no less (12/15/1859).
The St. Louis Business Journal reported four of Bing Crosby’s toupees had been found in boxes of material donated to Gonzaga University in Spokane, Washington, his alma mater, (12/15/2000). The toupees, which Crosby called “scalp dollies,” were found in an aptly named box marked “Crosby toupees.”
Gawker.com reported discovering a secret memo written by Donald Trump’s face to his toupee, in which the the rug is accused of taking up too much prime real estate on the forehead, (12/15/2003).
